Subbing

I love special ed usually, but the other day I did a special ed class that was more behavior issues. I don't enjoy behavior issues. The day was moving along, when I had a child jumping around and I asked him to sit several times. I pointed my pencil towards him and that exact moment he sat and threw his head into the pencil tip. Really....I mean Really... He was fine and just sobbed for a bit before he finally joined the group with a pencil mark on his cheek. I tried to get him to stand up and go to the nurse, but he refused. He was fine after all. His head did not knock the pencil out of my hand and I wasn't holding it tightly. He returned an hour or so later with a huge band-aid on his face(a bit overkill I think.)

Some days I feel I should pay them for all the fun and others I think I need twice as much money. That was one of those later days.

Time can stop right now!

Man the kids are getting so old and it is freaking me out all of the sudden. Watching Qatar's concert the other night made me think of Gunnar's first concert in HS and now he's a senior. WOW!!!!! Time just moves so fast, I need it to stop so I can take a breath. At least once in awhile.

I was watching an old family video and many of those people are not even with us any more, what happened to all those years. I'm the age my parents were when I was in HS and I thought they were old then.(sorry, love you.) This was brought on by my scanning old photos of Gunnar as a baby. He has grown up so much and it has been a great journey, and a personal blessing to walk with him these past 17 years. I know it is hard when all the kids are little, you feel like you can never so anything. But, that changes in the blink of an eye.

Qatar, Ezekiel, Cenneidigh, and JT are all growing big and doing wonderful things with their time. We have our problems, but thank heaven, when you look back you only remember the good things. I love and cherish you guys, it had been my pleasure to be your mom. Now time stop, for a little while, please.

Old age and food

Being 41, I feel quite young, but I'll tell ya, the last few years have been really limiting in what I can and cannot eat. Cenneidigh was born and all of the sudden I could have no more dairy, I get completely ill when I have milk, ice cream, cheese, etc. A few years ago soy started to do the same thing and now it seems bread and bread products. I figure in another 40 years I'll be lucky to be able to eat anything. Going out to eat is not worth it, every time so far I end up sick a few hour later. This sucks, I think after trying to eat right and watch my calories for years(since 10th grade), I will end up hungry and grumpy because I can eat nothing but air. The ants can have my supper then, I guess.

Does any one really listen?

I saw my PA(my hands have keratinitis) and then my chiropractor(once or twice a month since my accident on those stupid ski's) yesterday, I told them both I was a bit stressed and unable to figure out a way to get over it. They both told me that once my routine was set again(kids in school, etc.) things would get better. Okay, but what if they don't? I wasn't asking for Valium, even though sometimes I'd like some. I was asking for some stress management tips or classes. I guess I will take their advice and see how it goes, but if I don't feel more relaxed and stop holding my shoulders against my ears all night, I may need to look at other options. Stress is a killer guys, or didn't you get the memo?

Drug test

I'm actually up to post this one. I didn't eat any protein for dinner, so I'm shaking, inside and out, and stuffing my mouth with peanut butter to get it to stop so I can go back to bed. I really hurt my knee and so I'm off of P90X for a week(last week), but I guess I still need to eat protein. Back to the protein shakes tomorrow. I will start with the workouts for my upper body tomorrow. Ice and Advil are helping, but my knee still hurts, Sliding down the hill was not a good idea, I guess.

Here is the actual post. I had to pee in this cup for Hormel the other day. WHY? I've had the same taste testing job for 14 years off and on, and now they want a urine sample?(I make a few hundred bucks a year, very part-time.) It took about an hour to figure out where to go(that is another story on its own, it is like another world out there behind the tall fences of the plant, I much prefer the front door to the back.) I filled out four long forms and then had an interview about my answers and then the test that you wait for the results. If I had known how long it was going to be and the problems I would have finding the place I would have told them to keep their ham and the few bucks I get and forget it. (If I have to do that again I will) I've had a drug test before, for some job, but this took forever.(You cannot wash your hands until you hand the sample to the person, pee in a cup and not hit my hand? HOW? YUCK!!! Zeke thought it was funny I hit my hand, he's glad to have something to aim with. HAHA)

Overwhelmed

I don't know about the rest of you out there, but lately I've felt very overwhelmed by life in general. Constant stream of things to do, get done, go see, clean and cook. The illness in our home has been high this year and I feel like I'm never well. I'm home very little and in the car on a constant basis. Go here, pick up here, drop of here, and don't forget the other six people in the house and their schedules. I hate remembering everything and I tell the kids I can't hardly keep up with my schedule let alone theirs. As spring emerges, life just gets more busy. More subbing, more concerts, more sports activities and more birthday parties. We have an average of four birthday parties a month for someone. Family or friends of the kids. Crazy busy and I need a break from it all. This is were I wish for more money then I need so I could go spend a week on the beach somewhere, doing nothing.

Sizes of clothes, how does anyone know anymore?

This may sound crazy, but I'm having a hard time with clothing size. I have been the same size most of my life, give or take a few years with babies and nursing, but now everything is crazy. I weigh 130, I work out and I lift weights(not much I'll have you know, but some.) In HS I was a size 11 in 10th grade and dropped back down to a 7-9 the rest of the time(I felt like a cow, everyone around me was a 0).

Okay back to the story, the last pair of Old Navy jeans I bought(5-6 years ago) size 8 and they fit great. I decided it was time for new jeans and so off to the mall. After an hour and a half I found the problem. I'm now a size 4 even a 2 in some styles. WHAT!!!!!!! I'm the same size, I still fit the size 8 jeans. Nothing has changed except my hips have dropped into my thighs(saddle bags yea!) I bought the above jeans Levi 505, straight leg and mid rise, I also got the 515, boot cut mid rise size 4 medium. Very comfortable and flattering.

But, what the heck is going on with the clothing sizes. I even now wear an extra small shirt and that is ridiculous, what about the truly extra small people in the world aka Vanessa. Can she find anything to fit? I hate shopping for clothes, too many sizes to choose from and every style is a different size, this is when I wish I was a man. Know your size and buy it even without trying it on, that's a dream.

What's Important to YOU!!!

Just a reminder to think about what is important to you. My family is important to me and I put them first. Concerts(by the dozens), activities outside and in(even in the snow), family home evening even if that means having it a different day to accommodate the different schedules, missed sleep( also important to me), shivering cold waiting in the car to pick someone up from school or an activity, hearing the same piece played or sung a thousand times until its perfect, reading and reading the same books to be sure everyone has a chance to hear it, birthdays, holidays, getting together for no reason at all, a lived in home with all the clutter to trim it, noise everywhere and the few quiet moments when everyone is fast asleep.

What things would you miss if they didn't happen this month? What would you wish you had done if you moved away? Would you miss sledding, or playing at the park if you suddenly became too ill to participate? Do something today you've been putting off until someday.

I hope you remember what is important as you rush around this month trying to find the perfect item to wrap. Maybe just a little time with someone special will do the trick. Maybe miss that meeting, or obligation that doesn't really fit in. What is IMPORTANT to you? We all know, you tell us loud and clear everyday with what you choose to spend your time doing. Choose wisely because someday may never come. It's no fun living with regrets.

Actually, its your life so do what you want.